This is your guide to local jargon and insider information useful in the navigation of Mammoth, provided here so you can enjoy your stay like you've lived here your entire life. Following that are our opinions with regard to the "Best of Mammoth." We want you to thoroughly enjoy your stay at our condominium, and hope these tips help!
Useful Local Terms and Information:
Epic -- Abundantly overused adjective employed by nearly every stoner, lift operator, boarder and skier that has spent any time at Mammoth. Its most common uses are to describe snow and weather conditions, but variations do occur. Example; "Bro, the snow beneath chair twenty one is epic."
Village People -- Rarely seen on the mountain or outside the confines of "The Village at Mammoth" these individuals are easily spotted. They drive giant luxury SUV's (usually too fast, and not very well), frequently wear fur, and carefully planned completely matching skiing or snowboarding "outfits," and they travel in packs.
Treat the Condo Like it's Yours -- 2009 is the first year that we decided to rent out our condominium since the renovation over five years ago. It is truly our second home, so please treat it with respect. For example... don't carve up the walls with your name or initials. You may notice some unsavory reminders on the walls in the loft from long ago guests. Who does that sort of thing??
Screamers -- Usually found in the late afternoon near the bottom of the hill or in the lodges, these little kids are having complete and total crying fits after being pushed to their physical and mental limits by well-meaning parents.
Lift Tickets and Rentals -- If you're renting gear at Canyon Lodge you can buy your lift tickets at the same time, skipping the line for lift tickets completely (they don't tell you that at the time, but ask). Also, if you want better than the usual rental equipment fare, the pro shop on the level just below the main floor of Canyon has great demo equipment for rent, and a very knowledgable group of guys working there to help with your selection. They'll also do a great job tuning and waxing your own equipment overnight (like large ski elves).
Tap Room Regulars -- Can usually be seen every night at the bar, The Tap Room. These regulars are frequently very good at playing pool, overly friendly, sometimes missing teeth, volatile when provoked, and are able to smoke a cigarette and projectile vomit at the same time.
Angry Santas -- Usually men but sometimes women, normally found in crowded situations around the mountain and in town. They run into your cart at Von's without apologies, yell at people perceived to be "cutting" in lift lines, and are generally rude to bartenders and service workers.
Ski In - Ski Out -- The new ski back trail to the village goes directly behind the condo. Just head out the back door, hike up the hill and ski down to the village where you can catch the gondola back up to Canyon Lodge. Coming home is even easier, just follow the signs for the ski back trail to the village.
Aussies (can also include those from New Zealand) -- The mountain for some inexplicable reason is teaming with these people. Usually lift operators or ski/boarding instructors, always friendly, usually attractive with good teeth, they seem to be everywhere. Perhaps there is some strange vortex that swallows twenty-something Australians and transports them directly to Mammoth's Main Lodge to report for work.
Expireds -- The term used to describe individuals wearing ski clothing from the 70's and 80's. They're easy to spot in faded neon colors or old school tight polyester pants, leathery skinned and sometimes sporting extremely long, heavy skis that haven't been sold since the late 70's. Happy in their oblivion, it's usually best not to get them started about how Mammoth "used to be." Expireds generally hate Village People.
Yard Sale -- Easiest to spot from the chair lifts, these events take place when a person has an epic wipeout (see, you're learning already) and their goggles, hats, helmets, skis, and poles are strewn about them all over the side of the mountain. It's best enjoyed immediately after the fall, usually the victim is a bit groggy and still for a few minutes.
Don't Feed the Bears -- The bumper stickers are everywhere in town, but in reality this is very serious and everyone's responsibility. Secure trash! During the winter keep the garage doors closed so the bears can't get in the trash cans, during the summer put your trash in the bear-proof containers placed throughout the complex, and please recycle! You will commonly see bears and coyotes around the complex in the evening and at night looking for garbage. The unfortunate consequence of bears eating trash and getting acclimated to humans is that they can eventually become a threat. If this happens they are killed by the park service. Please, do your part to keep our bears alive!
Evangelicals Beware -- Craftily, Mammoth schedules gay ski week, disabled skiers week, and black ski week all at the same time, "killing three minority birds with one stone" if you will. Usually it overlaps with St. Patricks day, probably with the thought being the usual Mammoth crowd will be too drunk to notice. These events are never officially sanctioned by Mammoth Mountain, and not called out on the Mammoth events calendar, but if you're there you'll notice something slightly different, "Honey, some of these people are not like the others." And if you're black, gay, and disabled, well... you-go-girl!
Von's -- The only grocery store in town. During the winter season don't ever go in on Thursday or Friday early evening. People have been known to go in and never come out!
Walk to Canyon Lodge -- It's about a block away from the condo, down some outdoor stairs and you're there. An easy walk, but don't wear ski boots for the trip or you'll be exhausted, remember, after all, the condo is at 8,400 feet.
Leave your Equipment in the Lockers - Definitely put your gear in a locker overnight at Canyon Lodge instead of dragging it back up the stairs to the condo! You don't want to turn your group of family and friends into a bunch of Screamers.
Drink the Water -- The cold water in the kitchen faucet of the condo is filtered, just like the bottled water you buy at the store, so please don't buy water in plastic bottles for use at the condo. Help conserve... yay earth!
Take the Bus -- Try to use the bus as much as possible, they run constantly and can get you anywhere you want to go in town or on the mountain. This cuts down on traffic and exhaust emmissions, yay for the earth. The bus picks up at the bottom of the stairs to Canyon Blvd by the Mammoth West sign. Bus routes are here.
Airport Transportation -- There are only a few flights in and out of Mammoth a day, so it's always good to arrange a ride to and from the airport in advance, there are very few taxi's in Mammoth (because the buses are so good) so think ahead,a link to transportation options is here.
The Best of Mammoth
Hamburgers -- Burgers Beware of Screamers!
Pizza -- John's Pizza Works
Mexican -- Gomez's Go early, the wait can be brutal
Steak -- Whiskey Creek Make reservations, don't order the fish
Local Dive Bar -- The Tap Room It's above John's Pizza Works, this is a favorite local hang out, with a pool table and cheap drinks, watch for the "regulars."
Nightclub --Whiskey Creek Upstairs from the restaurant, this cranks up after 10pm, it smells a bit like a stale locker room, the carpet is sticky, the music is usually tragic but it's always packed
Fine Dining with Questionable Atmosphere -- Nevados Amazing food, excellent service, but the building kind of looks like a double-wide. You need advance reservations, it's pretty expensive.
Fine Dining Mucho Atmosphere -- Restaurant at Convict Lake or Tamarack Lodge This one is a toss up, both are a bit of a drive and can be treacherous to get to in the winter, but offer great food and service and are worth the extra effort. Tamarack Lodge is a tiny room, so reservations are very difficult.
Lunch -- The Mill -- On the mountain at the bottom of Stump Alley, during good weather you can sit out on lounge chairs in the snow and eat lunch and have a beer in the sunshine!! One of the main reasons we love Mammoth.
Breakfast -- The Stove The wait to get in can be pretty bad, but they crank people in and out fast and efficiently for such a small place
Cheap good food -- Base Camp
Apres' Ski, Good Weather -- The outdoor deck at Main Lodge or outdoor bar at Canyon Lodge
Apres' Ski, Bad Weather -- Lakanuki Tiki Bar at the Village Cheap drinks and cheap bar food, take the Gondola down from Canyon Lodge and ride the bus back to the condo. Sometimes populated by Village People, but they usually prefer the Westin for Apres' ski.
Boarding Shop -- Wave Rave Huge selection, cool clothes, kinda pricey.
Ski Shop -- Kittridge Sports -- Great selection, also offers rentals
Mammoth Event -- The Pond Skim -- Never the same schedule year to year, this event is usually announced 2-3 weeks in advance, takes place at Canyon Lodge, and coincides with the closing of Canyon Lodge for the season. Crazies dress up in nutty costumes and try to ski/board across a long pond full of freezing water without falling in... very amusing.
Easy Hike -- Devil's Postpile and Rainbow Falls -- Very rare geologic formation and waterfall, you have to take a bus from Main lodge to get to the trail head, the trails are well marked. This hike is crowded with people and dusty, but it's one of those things you have to do at least once. There is a trail map in the condo, please return it when you're finished.
Medium Hike -- Duck Lake -- Stop at the last lake before the pass up to Duck Lake (unless you want to turn this into a marathon difficult hike).
Thigh Burner Hike -- Fern Lake -- The trail head is off the left side of the road on the south side of June Lake. This is intense, straight uphill for about a half mile, with a beautiful waterfall, amazing views of Mono Lake, and beautiful Fern Lake at the end beneath a glacier. There are very few people on the trail. Be alert, we've seen bobcat and bears on this hike.
Fly Fishing -- Twin Lakes -- Located above the town of Mammoth, you can rent a boat and even fishing gear if you need it. Absolutely beautiful scenery with a waterfall cascading into the upper lake.
Sledding - Sledz -- Just off Minaret Road on the way to Main lodge, inner tubes, a tow line... good times, tons of Screamers
Coolest place to Stay -- Do you really need an answer to that?
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